Week 6, Day 6

So most women at this stage complain about their morning sickness.  I have a confession to make, I haven’t experienced it.  I have the heightened smell, and a slight sour stomach.  But none of that is forcing me to run to the toilet.  Of course, like everything else, this concerns me.

Today was the first day after Labor Day, when all the doctors’ offices were finally open.  “Great!” I thought, “I’ll just call and set up an appointment with the midwife I saw a couple of months ago.  I’ll get in sometime this week, easy.”  Easy?!  What was I thinking? Wrong.

First off, the midwife left to go with another clinic — which wasn’t open today.  “Okay fine,” I told myself, “I’m not particular.  I just want to see someone and have them tell me that everything is normal, and my hypothyroid wasn’t going to hurt the baby.”  They informed me that they were booked solid until mid October.  .   .  No.  Not going to work.  At this point, I can start to feel myself becoming completely unglued.

I call my mother’s doctor’s office.  She has been with the same doctor for 29-years.  They don’t even want to see me until I’m at least 8 weeks along.  Really?  It’s the first time I heard anything like that in my research for a first OB appointment.  They schedule me for an appointment on September 18th.  I told them, “Hey I have thyroid issues and I would like to get some blood work done on my HCG and Thyroid levels before I come in for my appointment.  Just so that I know everything is normal.”  Since I’m not an established patient, they won’t allow it until I come in for the exam on the 18th.  Even after I tell them I will sign a records release waiver for them.  I’m pretty upset at this point.

Fine!  I call another doctor’s office close to home.  It’s just a Family Primary Care clinic, and they won’t be able to see me through the pregnancy, but they can run some blood tests at least.  They can’t see me until next Tuesday.  At least that’s something right?   Whatever.  I’m too pissed to even think straight.

The hormones. . . oh the hormones have convinced me that the doctors are trying to kill my baby.  They know I have hypothyroidism.  They know that can lead to miscarriages.  I don’t even have morning sickness!  What if. . . What if.  .  .    The anxiety I felt was sickening.  Even if irrational.

I did what I have been doing a lot with this pregnancy, sob on top of my dog and then call my mom.  She suggested that I find the hospital I want to give birth at, and then find a doctor affiliated with that hospital and see if that works.  It does.  Like a charm.  My first OB appointment is on Thursday of this week.  For my husband and me, the “right” thing for us to do is always the easiest.

It’s amazing how hormones can fog your brain.  The idea that I should figure out the hospital I want never even passed my mind.  How many of you had issues finding a doctor once you realized you were pregnant?

But back to the morning sickness thing.  I feel that it could be an indication of many things, but the most preferable explanation could be that on average, I was having very irregular 38 day cycles.  One cycle in the past 8-months was 25 days and another was 48!  Because of this I didn’t test until day 43 (last Friday), and because of this, my little embryo might not be “old enough” to be producing enough hormones to make me sick.  Perhaps I’m only on week 5?  Another reason I might not be experiencing it, perhaps pregnancy just agrees with me.  My husband told me that maybe my body is so used to messed up hormones, that it doesn’t seem abnormal to me.  LOL.  Thanks hun.  Or we might be expecting a little energetic boy!  Thursday will tell us that this pregnancy is healthy, and I am a worry-wart!

Not Me.

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